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06 August 2007 @ 07:27 am
Title: Mate
Pairing: Dean/Sam
Rating: PG-13
Summary: Everything changed for Dean three years ago.
Author's Notes: The tenth installment of my Werewolf 'Verse. Because this is AU I've been playing around with the whole timeline and Sam's abilities. Please review.
Disclaimer: Everything Supernatural related belongs to Eric Kripke and the CW. Lucky bastards.
Most of my information came from Werewolves Powers and Werewolves. Also for this part Hunter's moon - Wikipedia

Dean watched Sam stalk angrily away to stand at the edge of the dock, looking over the murky water of the lake. Newly fifteen, Sam had decided to rebel against everything John said. He didn’t want to hunt and he didn’t want to travel. He just wanted to stay in one place and go to school.

Dean glanced at his father’s back. He was sick of being stuck in the middle already; hated having to choose between his father and his brother.

After giving John a single pat on the shoulder, telling him wordlessly that he would handle the brat, Dean started for the dock. His boots had just landed on the wood when a green, slim covered hand emerged quick as lightning and yanked Sam into the water by his ankle.

The youngest Winchester gave a startled cry as he fell then disappeared under the surface. Dean was running before it even registered what was happening. He could hear John running just behind him, shouting Sam‘s name.

The cold water was a shock to Dean’s system as he dived in, but he ignored the discomfort as his fingers searched desperately through where he couldn’t see. His lungs started to burn and as soon as he encountered wet fabric, he grabbed on and kicked off the bottom of the lake as hard as he could.

John was kneeling anxiously on the dock when Dean surfaced with a gasp of air, and together they pulled Sam’s limp body out of the water. Immediately upon seeing he wasn‘t breathing, Dean started CPR. Holding Sam’s nose, he blew air into his brother’s lungs, then counted one.. two.. three.. before doing it again. “C’mon, Sammy,” he said desperately with each failed attempt. “C’mon, c’mon, c’mon!”

Sam was unresponsive, and just when Dean was beginning to panic, he started coughing and gasping as water spilled from his lips.

John turned Sam onto his side, saying soothing words and rubbing his back as more water emerged from his mouth. When the coughing subsided, Dean pulled Sam into his arms, his brother’s back to his chest. He rocked Sam gently without really realizing it, his hands sliding over the other boy with a desperation to feel Sam alive and breathing fueled by the knowledge he had almost lost him before his very eyes.

Listening to Sam’s intake and release of air coming more easily and feeling his head resting on Dean’s shoulder, Dean closed his eyes and allowed himself to relax for the first time since seeing his brother disappear under the surface of the water. He realized with a start at that moment, with John watching, just how much the boy in his arms meant to him.

Dean was in love with his own brother.

He rebelled against his feelings, scared of them. As the years went by he continued to pick up women in bars and hunts, fucking them in random places. It was the only way he could keep himself from grabbing his brother and touching him all over. Tasting him and feeling how hot he was inside and out. Dean hardly ever let Sam see his hookups, feeling almost ashamed and angry at himself for it. Sam was his brother and that was as far as their relationship was supposed to go. Fucking women shouldn’t feel like he was cheating on a longtime lover.

When Dean awoke to find that he’d been taken by Gwen and her pack, his first thoughts were of Sammy. Looking around the old barn he found himself in, the hay scratchy even beneath his jeans, he saw no sign of his brother and felt a momentarily flare of relief. Sam was safe then.

Shirtless and bound, he watched Gwen prowl around him with eyes dark with hunger as the rest of the pack watched from a distance. Without any weapons or any means to acquire any, he was helpless to do much else except try to keep her occupied with his usual smartass comments.

“No one knows where you are,” she said with a knowing smirk, reaching to cup his face in her hands. “There’s no need to act so rebellious. I’m going to free you from what holds you back, demon hunter.”

Dean tried to pull away, but she was much stronger than a regular woman and he couldn’t budge as her hands tightened painfully on his face.

Licking her lips, Gwen kissed him roughly before releasing him and moving around behind him. Her fingernails traced hard over the bare skin of his back, leaving welts behind and making Dean hiss. He cried out in pain when without warning he felt her sharp teeth sink into the skin of his shoulder blade. Blood trickled to the surface and Gwen rubbed her lips through it to leave trails over his skin like war paint.

Dean fought as hard as he could against his transformation the first time, his body on fire and sweat pouring off of him.

“It won’t hurt if you stop fighting it,” Gwen told him, her voice raising in amusement. Her lips were still stained red from his blood, a crude imitation of lipstick. “It’s a beautiful change, Dean. Accept it and be unstoppable.”

“Fuck you!” he spat, his body giving a jerk as another pained cry slipped passed his parted lips. He felt his bones shrinking and shifting; his form changing.

When it was over, the pain disappeared as though it had never been and Dean was startled to find that he felt more amazing than he ever had in his whole life. It was as if someone had just told him all the answers he’d ever wanted, all wrapped up in one package.

He could see better, and his sense of smell was better. He was stronger and faster. All of these things stayed with him once he was back in his human form, and Dean felt like he could do anything.

As powerful as he felt, Dean knew he had to have one more thing. Just one more.

He stood outside the motel room for hours, his hair sticking to his head from the cold rain that he hardly noticed even as he started to shiver. He could see Sam so clearly through the window, pacing back and forth and twirling his phone between his shaking hands.

John’s truck was gone; had been for some time. When he was ready to make his move, Dean stalked forward to the door to claim his long awaited prey.

As soon as Sam opened the door and their eyes locked, Dean saw the relief in Sam’s face. When brother dragged him inside, scolding him, Dean inhaled deeply taking in Sam’s scent. It was intoxicating and the wolf inside Dean panted with desire and hunger. He’d never craved anyone so much as he did then and there was no turning back.

“You know what happened next,” Dean said, dragging himself and Sam back to the present.

Sam looked down at the blade of grass he was twirling between his fingers. The impala’s hood was cold beneath his ass as he and Dean sat on her, the engine long been turned off. Usually Dean would have protested them sitting on his car, afraid to scratch the paint, but tonight she was like their anchor keeping them grounded.

“Say something, Sammy,” Dean urged. He hated the silence. There’d been too much of that between them lately.

Even after Dean’s pledge to earn his brother’s trust back, Sam refused to let him anywhere near touching him. He even insisted on getting separate beds when they booked motel rooms, which was the worst. Even without sex Dean had liked laying spooning his brother. Sam’s warm skin against his own had helped him sleep, and now alone in the bed he always tossed and turned for hours.

It felt like when they were younger, and Dean had finally decided he was old enough for his own bed when they stayed in apartments for lengths of time so they could attend school. Surprisingly John had agreed. The first few nights neither boy could sleep, so used to being tangled up together. Eventually they got used to it, but this wasn’t the same situation and their relationship was no longer so innocent.

His only consolation was that Sam seemed to be having the same problem, but whenever Dean casually suggested they share a bed again, his brother’s jaw would clench and he would turn his attention elsewhere as if he hadn’t even heard him.

It was frustrating, one more than one level.

When they went out together, be it to bars or on hunting cases, Dean could always feel Sam’s eyes on him when there was a pretty girl around. He was just waiting for Dean to mess up; give him a reason to pull back even further. Dean refused to let that happen, and did everything he could to not flirt back with the women who were so freely coming onto him. Some of them took the hint pretty quick, but others were stubborn or oblivious up until the very end where they asked him not so discreetly to leave with them. They always looked stunned when he refused. One woman had even slapped him although Dean had done nothing to lead her on.

Sam’s expression never changed.

The hardest part was Dean really had no idea just how he was going to earn Sam’s trust back. Turning down women was really not helping at all.

Dean was a little startled when Sam started softly laughing.

“You’ve been in love with me for three years? Dean, I’ve felt like that about you since I was ten.”

“Ten year olds don’t know what love is, Sammy.”

“I didn’t know what it was at the time, but I do now. Besides some nineteen year olds don’t know what love is either. We’re not normal, especially not now,” he added the last part as Dean released a snort. “I worshipped you growing up, Dean. You were everything Dad wasn’t, always taking care of me and making sure I had what I wanted. As long as it was possible of course. I don’t know when those feelings changed, it wasn’t some life threatening event like what happened when I was fifteen but it happened all the same. Why do you think I barely fought you that night in the motel room?”

Dean didn’t reply, not really knowing how to. He looked up at the darkening sky and felt the moon’s approach with his body. “It’s almost time,” he said.

Sam nodded, looking up as well. The Hunter’s Moon was due to appear tonight, and the two of them were eager for her bright face. Although it was a myth that werewolves needed the moon’s silver rays to change into their animal selves, it was true that the sight of the moon called to them like a mother to her child. Being the Hunter’s Moon, that pull was doubled.

This was a time for all nightly creatures both supernatural and non to emerge to hunt and play.

“Don’t think this sharing and caring changes anything, Dean,” Sam said as they got off the car. He tossed the piece off grass away and pulled off his shirt. “It doesn’t change what you did, or my feelings about it. I’m still not sure I can trust you.”

“How long is it going to take, Sammy?” Dean asked, placing his own removed clothes on top of the impala where they’d just been sitting. He did want to earn his brother’s trust back, but was becoming frustrated with how little his efforts seemed to be making a difference. Despite being mates he still wasn’t a “chick-flick” person and didn’t think he ever would be. Declarations of affection hardly worked for him outside being passionate and since that was something Sam refused to do with him he was at a total loss.

“I don’t know, Dean,” Sam replied, irritated. “What the hell do you want, a timetable?”

“It’d be nice,” Dean muttered.

“Fuck off.”

Both naked, they stood for a moment to enjoy the silver moonlight on their skin before changing into their wolf forms. Sam took off into the field they were parked in, Dean close behind.

Sam’s mood lifted as they tumbled and ran together, their contrasting fur colors looking like yin and yang. Both wolves’ green eyes glowed even brighter in the silver light, lightning bugs flashing almost the same color all around them in tiny bursts of color. As it was getting late in the year, the amazing fact these little insects were out at all just added to the awe of all of it.

It was fantastic.

After they had worked off their energy, Dean changed back into his human form and retrieved something from the car before he urged Sam to change too.

Staying naked, they sat facing each other in the field. Dean pulled two tarot cards from a felt pouch in front of him. Catching glimpses of the cards, Sam saw one was Hierophant V, and the other The Star XVII.

“One for each of our birthdays,” Dean said without looking at his brother. He felt Sam’s surprised stare and knew why; he was never one to use tarot cards and spells like this. However this wasn’t any ordinary time for them, so why not travel off the norm at least a little.

Dean reached over and yanked a strand of hair from Sam’s head, ignoring his yelp, and did the same to himself. Carefully, he knotted the hairs together with three knots, then placed them between the cards which were positioned face to face. Next, he used a paperclip to keep the cards together.

“A binding spell, Dean?” Sam asked, his voice somewhere between amused, touched, and confused. “Christo?”

“Fuck you,” Dean smirked at him. Turning serious, he grabbed Sam’s hand and held it in his own. The bound cards lay on the grass between them. “As much as I hate mushy moments, this needs to be said. I am sorry, Sammy. You know I never want to hurt you, physically or mentally. I did this so that you’d know I do really want to be bound to you with more than just because we’re mates by bite. I.. you know that I..”

Sam arched an eyebrow expectantly. He knew what Dean was trying to say, but would be damned if he made it easy on him.

Dean swallowed thickly, his fingers tightening around Sam’s hand. “I love you.” The words felt foreign and strange on his tongue, but although it was uncomfortable Dean decided he liked how Sam’s expression softened as he said them.

“I love you too.”

Continued in Hunt

Current Mood: draineddrained
Current Music: Dana Glover: It Is You (I Have Loved)
Rocit63rocit63 on August 6th, 2007 12:54 pm (UTC)
Awwww! I loved this update!!! Thank you, more soon please!
kiraynnkiraynn on August 6th, 2007 03:38 pm (UTC)
thanks, I'm glad you liked it =) I pretty much have the next chapter planned out already so it shouldn't take too long *g*
katie_the_sithkatie_the_sith on August 6th, 2007 01:05 pm (UTC)
YAY *does wild pelvic thrusting in celebration* an update! w00tness. it was a good one too. i'm so happy right now.
kiraynnkiraynn on August 6th, 2007 03:41 pm (UTC)
xD do a little daaaance LOL thank you, I'm happy you liked it ;)
ephinee on August 6th, 2007 01:18 pm (UTC)
Yes!! I was thrilled to see this update when I checked this morning. (Yeah, I check first thing every morning *grins* ) I loved the peek into the night Dean was turned. Sammy was definitely sticking to his guns and not giving Dean a break. I think the binding ritual got to him though. So, will there be make-up sex in the next post?!? *beams innocently* Can't wait for more! Thanks for updating!
kiraynnkiraynn on August 6th, 2007 03:45 pm (UTC)
thank you! =) I really wanted to show what happened to Dean at least a little bit. xD actually even though they said love, Dean's not all the way forgiven just yet ;)
littlestarlinglittlestarling on August 6th, 2007 05:40 pm (UTC)
Awwww!! Sammy loves his Dean, and I love this fic even more with each update!
kiraynnkiraynn on August 6th, 2007 10:22 pm (UTC)
thank you, hon =)
GuardianAngel_xguardianangel_x on August 6th, 2007 10:50 pm (UTC)
YAY!!!!!! Update! :D

Heh, go Dean and your silly chick flick moments! See, he really DOES like them... he just doesn't want anyone to know! ;)
kiraynnkiraynn on August 6th, 2007 11:48 pm (UTC)
yes he does, he just has his bad boy image to maintain xD
Sun Childsunchild1982 on August 6th, 2007 11:16 pm (UTC)
Now I just loved that chapter... Finally Dean is starting to open up and not before time. Can't wait for the next update.
kiraynnkiraynn on August 6th, 2007 11:51 pm (UTC)
thanks =) yeah it was bound to happen at some point *g*
(Anonymous) on August 7th, 2007 01:19 am (UTC)
I so love this verse!!!! But now I'm curious which one then is the white wolf and which one the black one?
kiraynnkiraynn on August 7th, 2007 01:29 am (UTC)
thank you! =) I couldn't decide so I'm going to leave that up to the reader, which is why I didn't specify. so whichever one you want to think is Sam and which one is Dean, then that's them ;)
(Anonymous) on August 9th, 2007 04:09 am (UTC)
I like that answer! Cause you're right you know everyone would want them different, probably 50/50 right down the line. Me I'm going with Dean as the white wolf, Sam the black. I have absolutely no reasoning for this, just works for me. :) More soon please!
anguiferanguifer on August 7th, 2007 03:51 am (UTC)
Another wonderful chapter, as always! I love mushy Dean! I'm glad they finally worked things out; it's not fun when the two of them are fighting.
kiraynnkiraynn on August 7th, 2007 03:19 pm (UTC)
thank you! do I still get cookies? xD yeah I like Dean when he's all aggressive/protective but he's just as awesome when he's being all "omg I would totally hug you if I didn't think you'd hurt me" too ;) especially with Sammy.
anguiferanguifer on August 8th, 2007 01:20 am (UTC)
*offers you fresh bakes chocolate chip cookies with a grin*

But of course! We usually only see "tough guy" Dean, so it's always a treat when an author can make him fluffy without making him out of character. You portray him well!
kiraynnkiraynn on August 8th, 2007 01:16 pm (UTC)
yay chocolate chip! xD thank you, hon! I'm happy you think so =D I love his personality.
zombeanzombean on August 7th, 2007 07:41 am (UTC)
awww yay! Wolves in love, that's so cool! I like how you drew it out, that Dean wouldn't be forgiven straight away - Sam is a stubborn piece of work, he'd make Dean pay for it! Nice details :)
kiraynnkiraynn on August 7th, 2007 03:21 pm (UTC)
thank you! I'm glad you liked it ;) yes no way could I picture Sam forgiving Dean straight off the bat just because he was sorry. not even in canon if the situation was harsh enough. but I love Sam when he's a stubborn bitch so it works out xD
mossylawnmossylawn on August 7th, 2007 04:18 pm (UTC)
I'm so happy you updated I'mma explode.

I just have to help my bro and then I'm all into it.
kiraynnkiraynn on August 7th, 2007 04:48 pm (UTC)
xD okay, just don't explode quite yet ;)
(Deleted comment)
kiraynnkiraynn on August 7th, 2007 04:51 pm (UTC)
thanks so much, I'm glad you like it =) I'll have the next installment out soon since I know how I want it to go. it's just the matter of actually writing it that takes me a while xD
angels3angels3 on August 11th, 2007 03:57 am (UTC)
this was sweet and damn I feel for Dean but I can't blame Sam either. I have to become Switzerland and see how it unfolds cause I can't even take sides.
kiraynnkiraynn on August 11th, 2007 04:54 am (UTC)
Re: *sniffles*
I can't really blame Sam either but with enough determination Dean might just get all of him back ;) thanks for the review!
shelgrainger2shelgrainger2 on August 14th, 2007 01:27 pm (UTC)
Dean is trying so hard to reagain Sammy trust but it is still good to see Sammy make him work hard for it lol! Great update.
kiraynnkiraynn on August 14th, 2007 04:23 pm (UTC)
thank you! =) it's both the mate and little brother in Sam that makes him so stubborn *g* but I wouldn't have it any other way xD